IF THAT WAS MEANT FOR GOOD…why did it hurt so bad?

I want to start off by saying that I have some of the most amazing God Loving people in my life.  I am so thankful for every person that God has deposited into my life throughout this journey.  I also have many beautiful friends that haven’t discovered the Love of Jesus for themselves yet… I’ll keep praying for them to see the light and I’ll keep loving them in their journey.

But today, I want to share specifically about my Christian friends & Sisters.  Those ones that are with you through thick and thin, my Paster calls them your 3:00 am friends, because you know that they will Always be with you, no matter the time… I sure hope you have a couple of those friends because they are worth more than Gold.

But here’s the thing; we ALL. look at life through our set of lenses (based on our circumstances and experiences) yet, WE often want others to see things through OURS.  I have learned that this rarely works, and is often the cause of many friendships breaking away and crumbling.

Let me help you see where I am coming from.  I was having a particularly bad day… creditors were calling, I didn’t have answers or solutions for anyone,  I felt alone and broken into a thousand little pieces.

As I so often do when I feel like this, I reached out to some friends for prayer support.  I am so thankful for these special ladies that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, will stop what they are doing and lift me up to the Father for strength & guidance.  So often I also receive wonderful scripture and messages to encourage my heart.

Yet this day was slightly different as the scripture I received back did not bring me any comfort, if fact all I could feel every time I read it was condemnation.  My first reaction was to be hurt, to allow the sting of those words to penetrate my heart and percolate over and over again.  What was she trying to tell me?  I thought she was my friend and Loved me?  This doesn’t feel very Loving….Lord how do I take this???

Fortunately, the Holy Spirit prompted me to reach out and actually find out where she was coming from, and I’m going to tell you this was a tough phone call to make.  This is one of those pivotal points where the enemy really wants you to harbour a grudge so that he can cause pain & division… he does not want us together, nor does he want us to have support, because two or three together are stronger than one alone.

I’m so thankful that I did, together we were able to have a beautiful conversation as to what that particular passage meant to her, and what she wanted to express to me.  It had absolutely nothing to do with condemnation, and once I was able to see from her lens of perspective, I could see the encouragement she intended for me.

She felt terrible when I explained how the words had originally hurt me, as she had absolutely no ill intent.  Thankfully, by listening to Gods prompting, we were able to discuss this in a Loving and open-minded way.  We both grew that day in understanding of our words and responses as well as in our Friendship.

Why do I share this with you?  Because if I had followed my regular inclinations, and had not sought harmony and understanding, I very well could have retreated from one of the best Sisters in Christ I have ever had.  My human reactions are always linked to my experiences and my experiences in the past were not based on Love and acceptance.

As Christ followers, we need to always be aware that we are viewing life through our own personal Lens, and those lenses differ from how those around you may view the exact same situation.  It’s so easy to quote scripture that speaks into your life, that in reality may not speak the same way into theirs. I would encourage you to explain why you chose that scripture and what how it speaks to you.

Thats why I believe it is so important to follow the Biblical teaching for friendship with our Brothers & Sisters in Christ. Peter taught this passage in his letter to the early Christians who were facing persecution from all directions.  I truly believe that if we can respect each other enough to recognize we see things from differing perspectives, we can actually grow in how we see God at work within these situations ourselves.

I don’t know how I would manage this journey I am on, were it not for each and every person God has placed directly ( for a moment in time, or a season) in my path.  I have learned to Love looking at things through the lens of others, which I believe continues to changed and mold me.

Don’t get me wrong, I am definitely not a saint nor a perfect friend or Sister, but I am a work in progress, who recognizes that God does not want us going through hard times alone.  The enemy wants us to believe that nobody could understand, or that nobody would care.  I’m here to tell you, that is a Lie from the pit of Hell, he simply has an easier job attacking you when you are alone and vulnerable.

So if you are going through stuff in your life ( doesn’t have to be earth shattering things), reach out to those around you.  If you want to have a 3:00 am Friendship, BE a 3:00am Friend to others.  Love well and Love others, it is so worth it friends… You are Not alone.  If you don’t have these friends yet, start praying and asking God for them, to reveal them to you… then reach out and take a chance, you’ll be so glad you did.


Journal Entry:  #20

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for your Word.  Thank you for teaching us how to live as your children.  Forgive me when I try to live by my wisdom, which constantly falls short.  Lord help me to love my brothers & sisters in Christ in a way that brings honour to you.  

Forgive me for all the times that I avoided someone or didn’t show love or concern to their situations.  Teach me Lord, how to love them better, not only within my Church family, but in my neighbourhood and my workplace.  

Lord Forgive for for reacting and retaliating when others say or do something hurtful to me.  Teach me to pause & pray for your wisdom and guidance, so that I would not speak out of my hurt, thereby hurting them in return… repaying evil for evil. 

Lord Jesus, help me to find ways to be peaceful and humble with all those I meet and interact with.  Keep me Lord from doing anything evil in your sight that would cause you to turn your face away from me and not hear my prayers.  

Help me to be good, fair and righteous in your sight.  I want to Love you Lord with ALL my heart and ALL my mind, and I seek to Love others as myself, so that All I do would be pleasing in your sight.  

Help me Lord to follow your ways and do good things to help others.  Open their eyes that they might see You in the process.  Heavenly Father, I want to submit to you as Lord over my life… All of my life, not just in the easy ways but in every way.  Forgive me Lord, when I try to run things and be in control.  Help me to submit to your authority over me.  

As well, I pray that your light would shine through me, so that I would be a witness of your immeasurable Love to others.  Give me the right words to say when others ask about my faith.  Let my words by humble and gentle, steering others towards You. 

Lord God, You are true and just and although I cannot always see the bigger picture, I chose to trust You with my life.  Even if I must suffer for doing what’s right, I know that You will be there giving me everything I need.  I look forward to the day when You return Lord, and call your children home.  

Teach me to desire my Eternal home more than my temporary earthly one.  Break my worldly desires Lord, that cause me to be divided.  I want to be All in Lord… All in with You.     In Jesus name ❤️ Amen


My Final Thoughts & Encouragement:

Have you ever had someone you cared for deeply, say or do something hurtful to you?  What did you do? Did you stew on it and talk to others rather than the actual person? or did you reach out for clarification and have an honest conversation?

Honestly, it is so hard to do the right thing, when the wrong thing is just so much easier… This is how easily we can fall into sin, and end up talking to others about what he/she did or said… this is gossip and oftentimes slander, this rarely ends well and is difficult to come back from as trust is now broken.

Or the other thing that seems easier, is to do is to push it down, where it doesn’t actually go away but festers and grows in its hurt and anger.  Sadly, when you least expect it, when something else happens the lid pops off and everything starts spewing out like a shaken pop bottle.

Rather than either of these options, I would challenge you to think deeply about this person that hurt you.  You know their heart, is this out of character for him or her?  If the answer is yes, is it possible that they might simply have a different perspective that just needs to be clarified?

Friends, these friendships are priceless and needed, we are ALL going to fall short some of the time, we are broken people trying to find our way in a broken world.  Look to Peter, who I might add, did and said some pretty crazy things in his day, he was pretty much a speak first think later kinda guy.

Peter learned from his mistakes and I think he would have been my kind of friend, follow his advice rather than listening to our own worldly instincts which generally just get us into a messier soup. Now, this is the goal: to live in harmony with one another and demonstrate affectionate love, sympathy, and kindness toward other believers. Let humility describe who you are as you dearly love one another.  1Peter 3:8 TPT

Blessings, Janet❤️. Journey4Jesus


Do you know Jesus ? He’s waiting for you… ( click the link to learn more) 

adult affection beads blur
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{ If this benefited you in any way, I’d love to hear from you and I would be thrilled if you would share or invite more people to be encouraged. }

2 Comments on “IF THAT WAS MEANT FOR GOOD…why did it hurt so bad?

  1. Good morning ma’am, I was really blessed reading this. It spoke wisdom to me and has shaped my perception of my interpersonal relationships with my Christian brethren. I’ll rather talk to them than talk about them. Thank you for making me know that everyone sees through their own lenses not through mine.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts. I’m happy it spoke to you and that God chose to use it to grow others deeper in their faith journey ♥️

      Liked by 1 person

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